Live Without Fear

I live in fear much of the time. I've built a wall around myself to block out fear of failure, fear of rejection, and fear of the unknown. Don't even get me started on my fear of strangers and fear of another car accident. I'm also terrified that someone I love will get seriously injured or worse.

I had to really think about my fears two days ago when a woman at my husband's work was severely injured. Vince is a nurse at the county jail and an inmate attacked one of my husband's co-workers. My husband could easily have been the target of such violence and that scares me to no end. I really had to pray when he told me about the incident. More importantly, I really had to stop thinking and just listen, really listen, to what God wanted to say. I realized that Vince could have been in that position, but he wasn't. God has called Vince to work at a dangerous place for this season and God will protect him.

Ironically, Vince is going back to school to work in an even more dangerous field. When he first told me of his new dreams, I had to step back and not let my emotions get the best of me. I realized that this is what God has called him to do and to do anything less would be out of God's will... that is not a place I'm willing to go. I would also hate for Vince to look back at his life and think of all the "what if's." To be the best wife I can be, I have to support God's plan for my husband. So yeah, I'm still scared. But my faith is bigger than my fear. When God calls any one of us to go home, the decision is a deliberate one for God. It's my daily decision on how I will live: paralyzed in fear or living with trust.